


Hard to Kill (Again)

by sherlocksbuttonhole (daleksanddetectives)



Category: Kingsman: The Secret Service (2015)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Gen, Lots of talk about death, Partially Deceased Syndrome, Past Domestic Violence, Retelling, The Rising (In the Flesh), kingsman x in the flesh, undead!Eggsy Unwin
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-06-24
Updated: 2015-06-24
Packaged: 2018-04-06 00:46:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4201443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daleksanddetectives/pseuds/sherlocksbuttonhole
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>The bloke is alright, really. Apparently he knew Eggsy’s father, back when he was a Marine. He also knows an awful lot about Eggsy, and Eggsy thinks Harry must have read an outdated file because he hasn’t mentioned the tiny fact that he legally died five years ago.</i>
</p><p>  <i>"I also know from your file that you're PDS." </i></p><p>  <i>Ah, there it is. </i></p><p>Or: The Kingsman/In the Flesh fusion no one asked for. (You don't need to have seen ITF to understand the story.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hard to Kill (Again)

**Author's Note:**

> Basically a re-telling of the film if Eggsy died five years earlier and came back during the Rising, and how this would affect the movie.
> 
> In 2010, people who died in 2009 came back as zombies in the Rising. A lot of the rabid undead were hunted until a medication called Neurotriptyline was created that would return them to who they were before they died and they could be reintroduced to their old lives. Although most are happy to have their loved ones back, many are still hesitant about having the undead among the living and fear a repeat of the Rising.

When Eggsy rose from the dead, he was pleasantly surprised to find that his best mate Jamal had also popped back up and his mum healthy with a little baby girl tucked under her chin. Eggsy fell in love with his step-sister immediately when his mum came to pick him up from the treatment centre just outside of London and introduced them. Unfortunately, he also found that even though it had been a few years since the Rising, the people of London were still more than wary of the partially deceased, so he made sure to lay low and double check his contacts and cover-up mousse before he went out anywhere. 

And then he finds himself possibly facing 18 months in prison. He asks to make a phone call and pulls out the medal he's been wearing around his neck since he was a child and had been buried with. 

Not an hour later he finds himself in a pub with a posh bloke in a suit called Harry Hart who claims to have been the man who got him released. The bloke is alright, really. Apparently he knew Eggsy’s father, back when he was a Marine. He also knows an awful lot about Eggsy, and Eggsy thinks Harry must have read an outdated file because he hasn’t mentioned the tiny fact that he legally died five years ago.

"I also know from your file that you're PDS." 

Ah, there it is. 

Eggsy flinches, "please don't tell no one. This area isn't exactly known to be friendly towards my type. If any of the lads round here found out I'm a dead man walking, I'm dead. Again."

He’s getting ready to launch into a well-practised tirade when Harry smirks, takes off his glasses and leans forward. When Harry lifts his head again, Eggsy gasps because where there had been a chocolate brown eye, was a pin-prick pupil surrounded by shocking white. Harry puts his contact back in and perches his glasses on his nose once he feels Eggsy has had a good look. 

"You aren't the only dead man walking, Eggsy." 

Eggsy gapes for a moment more. 

"How?" He shakes his head, "sorry. Just, I don't get to meet many other undead. How did it happen? If ya don't mind me askin'." 

"Officially, I was killed in action.” Harry raises his hand and points to roughly to where his heart is, “took a bullet to the chest that I could have survived had I had help. Now, my squad find it very useful to have someone who doesn’t feel pain. They couldn’t seem to get it into their heads that I  _can_ be killed again, however." The smile he gives Eggsy is sad, “and then I recently became a tailor.”

"My step-dad." Eggsy says after a beat of silence.

"Excuse me?" 

"He was a complete dick and ‘ad it in for me from day one. Some of his goons did me in. They were throwing me about and I bashed my head and didn't get to A&E til it was too late. ‘t’s why I wear caps most of the time now, got a pretty messy scar back there." 

"I'm sorry." 

"Nah, it's alright. Back now, ain't I? Good thing is they got done for it and are serving life sentences and Dean ain't about anymore. During the Rising he had a run in with my mate Jamal who's the same as us,” Eggsy gives Harry a twisted grin, “and since the second rising didn’t happen, he ain’t comin’ back.” 

Harry tries to hide his chuckle behind his pint as he takes a drink. 

"Oi, hang on a minute," Eggsy says, leaning on his elbows on the table, "how are you drinking? You know we don't work inside anymore, yeah?"

"Of course I know," Harry replies, "but I have to keep up appearances. I can take care of it later."

Eggsy raises his eyebrows, “you mean bein’ stuck heavin’ ya dead guts into the bogs for an hour?”

“I do what I must,” Harry shrugs.

“Fair enough.”

“Tell me, Eggsy. What do you do?”

Eggsy shrugs, “not much to be honest with ya. Piss about mostly, look after my sister when my mum is workin’," he raises an eyebrow, "nick cars.”

Harry sits back and folds his hands in his lap, “how would you like an interview to join me where I work?”

“What? As a tailor?”

“Of sorts.”

Eggsy raises his eyebrows. 

“Come with me.”

Harry stands and straightens his jacket. He hooks his umbrella over his arm and starts towards the door, a small smile crossing his face when he hears Eggsy’s trainers squeak as he follows. 

Outside, Harry’s cab is idling at the curb and he opens the back door and holds it for Eggsy, who climbs in and settles on the opposite seat. Harry is slightly more graceful sitting down and pulling the door shut. 

“To the shop, please,” he says to the driver. 

“Swanky car,” Eggsy murmurs, looking at the little screen built into the back of the front seats and bottles of amber liquid, “I’ve never met a tailor before, but I’m startin’ to think you ain’t one.”

Harry smiles, “how observant. Have you seen the film  _Trading Places_?”

“Nah.”

“How about  _Nikita_?” Eggsy shakes his head. “ _Pretty Woman_?” Eggsy pulls a face.

“Never mind. My point is, if you are prepared to adapt and learn, you can transform.”

“Oh,” Eggsy’s eyes light up, “like in  _My Fair Lady_?”

Harry turns in his seat, “you’re full of surprises. Yes, like in  _My Fair Lady_. In the case, I’m offering you the chance to become a Kingsman.”

“But not as a tailor?”

“As a Kingsman agent.”

Eggsy’s smile grows, “like a spy?” 

“Interested?” 

“What have I got to lose?”

Harry matches Eggsy’s smile as the cab slowly pulls up to the curb in front of the shop.

“Come on,” Harry says as he hops out of the car. 

Eggsy obediently follows him inside the tailors, curious that the man at the counter doesn’t seem to be giving him a second look. He lets Harry guide him into what seems to be a fitting room, where he shuts the door behind them and motions for Eggsy to look in the mirror.

“What do you see?” 

Eggsy raises his eyebrows, “someone who wants to know why the fuck he’s standing in a dressing room in the poshest tailors in London.”

Harry smirks.

“Didn’t even get fancy suit for my funeral. They buried me in in my jeans, bet you had summat nice.”

Their eyes meet in the mirror, “they buried me in my uniform. I had in my will that I wanted to be cremated, but obviously my family decided to ignore that.” 

“Harry, where were you buried? If ya don’t mind me askin’.”

Harry’s eyebrows raise slightly in surprise, “the village where I grew up in the North. I came back to London as soon as the Rising was over and got my job back here at Kingsman.” Eggsy nods. “Now, I’ve become a secret weapon of sorts. The majority of the other Kingsman agents are living, so they use me for the particularly dangerous missions.”

“Missions?” Eggsy repeats, “like a proper spy in the movies and that?”

Harry smirks, “still interested?”

“Oh yeah.”

With a knowing look, Harry leans forward and puts his palm against the mirror, making the room jolt and start moving down like a lift.

: :

After the short underground tube ride, Eggsy finds himself in some sort of high-tech manor. Harry leads him through the corridors, occasionally mumbling something about the history of Kingsman, until they round a corner to where a bald man is waiting with a tablet.

“Galahad.” He greets them.

Harry turns back to Eggsy.

“My code name.”

“Late again, sir?” The man gives them a smile that Eggsy can’t quite interpret. He turns to Eggsy, “in you go.”

Eggsy glances at Harry. 

“Good luck,” he says and motions at the door. 

With a steadying breath, Eggsy pushes his way into the room and tries not to react when all eyes turn to him.

Luckily, he doesn’t have to start introducing himself because the man follows behind and tells them to fall in. Eggsy scrambles to join the group and quickly copies their stances by putting his hands behind his back and standing straight.

“My name is Merlin.” 

 _Somehow that name suits him_ , Eggsy thinks.

“You are about to embark on what is probably the most dangerous job interview in the world.” He goes to the closest bed and picks up the bag lying on top of what look like pyjamas and towels. “Can anyone tell me what this is?”

“Body bag, sir.” One of the other lads answers.

Merlin goes into explaining the presence of the bags in relevance to their sworn secrecy at being there and what that means for them and their next of kin. Eggsy glances at the others and is surprised to see them all nodding solemnly.

“Understood? Excellent,” he smiles, “fall out.”

“Roxanne,” the girl holds her hand out, “but call me Roxy.” 

Eggsy hesitates for barely a second before shaking her hand. Hell, they’ll all find out sooner or later he’s PDS, might as well test the waters with the few who seem friendly enough.

“Eggsy.”

To Eggsy’s surprise, Roxy barely flinches. 

“Eggy?” She asks, still holding his chilly hand. 

“Nah, Egg _sy_.”

She nods, “nice to meet you.” 

“Where did they dig you up?” 

The body bag-lad has appeared behind Eggsy with two others, apparently this one has already established himself as leader. They introduce themselves as Digby, Rufus, and Charlie, and start questioning him about his schooling.

“I think we may have met,” Rufus says, “did you serve me at the McDonalds at Winchester services?”

“If I had I would have given you a special helping of secret sauce.”

 _Different place, same shit_ , Eggsy sighs as they wander off looking overly pleased with themselves.

Roxy notices Eggsy giving the body bag a wary look.

“Scare tactics," she says confidently, “no one’s gonna die.”

Eggsy pulls a face, “yeah, been there, done that. Wouldn’t recommend it, to be honest with ya.”

As Roxy hides her snort behind her hand the only other female recruit comes up to them. 

“Do you need a pen?”

He takes the pen from her outstretched hand and thanks her. Roxy steps forward.

“Eggsy, this is Amelia. Amelia, Eggsy.”

Amelia takes his hand in hers and squeezes with a meaningful look. 

“You too?” He whispers.

She just smiles before wandering away back to her bunk.

“How many of us are PDS?” Eggsy murmurs, glancing around the room.

“Doesn’t look like any of them are wearing the mousse, but then it’s getting harder to tell now they’re making it in more natural tones.”

Eggsy gives her a curious look to which she shrugs.

“My sister lets me borrow her cover up. It’s good for spots.”

Eggsy laughs, “glad mine isn’t old enough for make up yet. Mum on the other hand...”

Roxy smiles at him before turning to start unpacking. 

: :

One thing Eggsy was glad about not being like the undead in all those horror films he watched growing up, was that his body still needed sleep. He always found waking up after a solid few hours sleep left him feeling ready to start the day and face the curious looks of the living. He's happy to find that the Kingsman beds were comfortable enough for him to drift off quickly, that is, until he’s rudely woken by the sudden chill of water that even his broken down nerves can feel and the sound of the others in the room starting to panic. 

The water level is rising fast and he watches them snap out of the panic and at Roxy’s shout of “loo snorkels!”, they all dive in and head towards the far end of the room.

“What about the fucking door?” Eggsy manages just before the water level gets to the ceiling. 

 _Shit_ , he thinks, glancing down at his chest,  _cover up has started coming off_.  _Need to get out of here_.

He swims towards the door and pulls to no avail. He turns and looks around the room. Then he spots Amelia tangled in her bed sheets. Eggsy helps her free herself and gives her a shove towards the others. 

 _Gotta be_  something.  _This is a test_.

Eggsy watches Amelia swim away and tilts his head as he peers past her at the mirror. 

 _Worth a shot_.

He pushes away from the door and swims over the other candidates heads where they’re huddled around the loos with their make-shift snorkels. He watches their eyes collectively widen as they spot him and when he looks in the mirror he sees why. One of his contacts has come out.

 _Oh well, now they know_.

Eggsy settles his feet in the basin and raises his fist.

 _This had better work_.

When he brings his fist down against the glass, Eggsy is sure he hears a faint crack. He raises it again and sees a few spidery breaks where his hand had just been.

_Yes!_

He brings his fist down again and again until finally it smashes and Eggsy, the other candidates, and the water are pulled out through the hole where the mirror had been. Eggsy hits the wall and faintly feels some of the others fall against him. Once he’s managed to hack up the little water that had made its way into his lungs, he sits up to see everyone shivering and worriedly watching Merlin, who looks serious with his frown and clipboard.

“Congratulations on completing your first task.”

The candidates sit up straighter.

“ _However_ , as far as I’m concerned, Eggsy was the only one who passed this test.”

They glance around at each other.

“Charlie, Roxy, well done with the shower heads. Eggsy, nice work noticing Amelia needed help, this test was about teamwork, and that that was a double mirror.”

Charlie snorts, “he’s probably seen enough of them.”

“I used to eat brains of posh boys like you for breakfast,” Eggsy spits, knowing he makes quite an unsettling picture with smeared cover up and one white eye. 

Charlie pales slightly and leans away. 

“ _Right_ , off with the lot of you,” Merlin sighs, “there’s towels and fresh pyjamas in the room next door. Eggsy, come to my office down the hall once you’re changed.”

He nods at the recruits and turns to leave, clipboard tucked under his arm.

“Probably gonna kick him out for threatening another candidate,” Charlie smirks once the door shuts behind Merlin.

Eggsy glares and lets Roxy pull him from the room.

: :

Once dry and in a new set of Kingsman issue pyjamas, Eggsy makes his way to Merlin’s office and knocks on the door. There’s a muffled ‘ _come in_ ’, so he opens the door and steps inside.

“Eggsy,” Merlin starts, turning his chair and getting straight to the point, “I’m going to assume that your lack of bags means you didn’t bring your medication?”

Eggsy blinks.

“You didn’t call me here to kick me out?” 

Merlin frowns, “of course not. You did very well tonight. Now, while you’re here I’m going to be administering your Neurotriptyline. I won’t have you doing it yourself, so every morning before your daily task I want you to come see me.”

“Don’t ya have some kinda medical department for tha’?”

“Unfortunately, our staff are still being trained on how to treat PDS. Our doctors require the same amount of training they received to treat their living patients, we won't let them half-arse it like a lot of surgeries do. If you’re worried about me fucking it up, you needn’t. I give Harry his more often than not.”

“Huh,” Eggsy nods, “alright. You use the same stuff I got off the treatment centre?” 

“That’s what I’ll be giving you, yes. I wanted to tell you this privately since it's relevant to you, should you pass all the tests and become Lancelot, we have our own medication we created shortly after the Rising that will enhance both your senses and strength as well as keeping your brain healthy. I’ll have some contacts and new cover up brought in by the morning for you too, should you wish to still use them.”

“That all what Harry gets?”

Merlin nods.

“This spy stuff is all pretty cool, innit?”

“Get yourself to bed, Eggsy,” Merlin tries to hide his smile by rolling his eyes, “you’re going to have a very busy day ahead of you tomorrow.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come party on my [tumblr](http://sherlocksbuttonhole.tumblr.com/).


End file.
